Friday, October 10, 2014

Day 10: My Crutch on Wheels

I have two jogging strollers. One fits both my kids in it and can also attach to the back of my bike (which I have yet to brave), and the other is a solo jogging stroller. The latter is the one that is used most often as I attempt to lose this 2nd-baby-momma-weight; Maddie rides so happily, oblivious to my huffing and puffing up and down the hilly streets by our house.

Today, I ran by myself, and I felt lost. No stroller to push or baby to occupy my gaze.  No grips on the stroller, no fumbling to pick up a dropped doll, nothing. Nothing in my hands, nothing in front of me but open road.

I was reminded of how some things we cling to, like a crutch, simply because it is familiar and safe to us. Our hands are curled tight, because it's all we know.

Yet, when we let go, our hands are opened and we run in surrender. Our journey is full of steep hills and flat, never-ending-feeling-roads; yet, letting go and truly living in freedom brings joy and leaves self in the shadows.

My crutch on wheels isn't really my jogging stroller; I love sharing this time with my sweet babies... First Jonah, now Maddie Grace.

Fear of failure is my crutch on wheels. So is selfishness, pride, obsession with weight, comparison to others....

The list goes on and on. And I push it, these hindrances on wheels, because it's what I know. They are excuses that I use.

It's time to leave it. Push it to the side. Run the race you were called to run...

What's your crutch on wheels?


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